It's Not About the Pants

My old non-maternity pants? They still fit. I can even button them. But are they particularly comfortable? Not even. They're fine when I'm standing, but at the end of the day, after I've eaten anything, when I want to sit down, the button must come undone. So an inevitable milestone has been reached for me at 17 weeks pregnant: maternity pants. It's not even the pants that really mean anything, it's just that they symbolize a belly that won't stop growing, real physical proof that someone is in there.

With Alana I was so anti-belly panel it wasn't funny. So I bought low rise maternity jeans, or adjustable waist. These are good options if you like your pants to fall down and your butt crack to hang out, or if you like the inseam buttons to dig into your bony hips. It wasn't until I had Ava, and Motherhood invented Secret Fit maternity pants, that I realized the error of my ways. A panel, at least with the super stretchy and comfy secret fit panel, was actually comfortable. Alas, a miracle! My pants stay up! I can eat and not have to unbutton anything! They can be worn in the awkward squishy postpartum phase when any type of pants give you a muffintop that doesn't exist without them. Don't get me wrong, I hate maternity clothes. I wear my regular shirts 90% of the time, because the frump that haunts the maternity section doesn't really do it for me. But the time has come for this final pregnancy when I will no longer wear my normal jeans. So American Eagle jeggings that I love so much? See you next winter.

And now, proof of my ever expanding belly. Its my third kid, my abs aren't even putting up a fight. And I realize I look like an idiot in these pictures, but I was home alone with my tripod and my camera, so awkward self-timer shots it was. At least you'll have some good laughs.

I'm Not Feeling Monumental

Glancing at my blog list I realized I had 499 posts under my belt. That is a ginormous number. Number 500 should be big, but I'm not feeling it. I'm tired and pregnant and every spare second I have is spent doing homework or playing with my girls, mostly cause Alana requests my presence at playtime constantly. Wanna play with me in my woom? Sure, just don't boss me around too much. I have no idea where she got that from.

So instead of a wordy post you can now look at what I spend my days occupied with. Cute ladies. Enjoy.

The Exception to the Rule

The only time I don't mind being kicked by my children is when its from the inside. I just felt a few little kicks/punches and they are much different than when Ava kicks me when she is asleep. They are just a little reminder of my growing belly, that there is actually a person in there. I'm sure my ladies will be just as excited when they too can feel someone kicking at them from in my belly. As long as this one stays out of my ribs, unlike Ava, then we should be okay.

Before I Start High-Fiving Myself

I love Turbo Tax. It takes the guess work out of doing your taxes. Its cheap. Its easy. But its not idiot proof. Or pregnant woman brain proof. I've demonstrated that twice now. My downfall is the whole personal information section. I double and triple-check all my numbers and everything, but I can't seem to get my own name right. Yeah, my own name. Or my kids.

When I was pregnant with Ava I entered my own last name as my middle name instead, so my return was rejected and I had to fix it. This year I mispelled Alana's last name, so my return was sent back to me this morning. They get all preachy like This name does not match the social security number we have on file. And I'm all like What? I double and triple-checked everyone's social security number! Cause I did. And this year I double-checked my own name. But I didn't double check that I added the necessary "i" into the spelling of Alana's last name. Whoops.

So I found myself fixing a dumb mistake, then re-efiling and crossing my fingers that I fixed it and they still refund our money on the day I'm hoping for. Before I start spending that money in my head I should check my spelling, cause I'm prone to dumb obvious mistakes. And I'm gonna blame my pregnancy brain, cause last year I wasn't pregnant, and I did nothing stupid on my tax returns. Coincidence? I think not.

The Post Where I Ramble on Forever

My ladies keep life interesting. Ava goes without pants 90% of the time, but that is okay because she is potty trained. Until a couple of days ago she had a toilet aversion, but I was too lazy to keep trying to get her to use it. Then with some unsolicited encouragement from Alana, Ava suddenly became all about the toilet and discarded the potty. Alana is mostly responsible for the whole potty training mentality in Ava's brain, because Ava only wanted to do it because her sister did it. The only hurdle left to tackle is that she hasn't used a public toilet yet, so we'll see how that goes.

Alana spends most of her time right now playing, or watching The Rescuers Down Under, cause she is obsessed with it. We don't have it on DVD, but the Disney channel plays old movies all the time and we have DVR, so I record them and she watches them incessantly. There is also some iPod singing along going on with her, and if I hear the stupid Party Rock Anthem one more time I'm buying earplugs. Alana was a little lonely the last couple of days, because Ava had the stomach flu and spent most of her time passed out on the couch. This meant I had to put in a few extra hours of being bossed around while playing My Little Pony, but Alana wanted to play with her mommy so how could I say no. Ava is better today, so they're playing mostly nicely together and don't want my input on their game of fake cooking/barbies/babies/la la loopsy guys.

Time is going fast, probably because I have less than a week left of my Christmas vacation. I'm retaking the same biology class I got a C in last semester, and the class that immediately follows it which is taught by the same teacher. Its not too labor intensive with homework, but I need to study more and actually exert effort this time to get an A or a B. Both classes are only 8 weeks, back to back, then I'm done till next fall cause my mid-summer due date won't really give me time for summer school. David is also taking two classes, and one of them is 8 weeks, so halfway through the semester he will only have one class left. He isn't taking science classes though, so they're easy and require little effort. Lucky him.

The big looming thing in our house though is of course the next baby. My kids are obsessed. They squeal at the sight of other babies, so of course they're happy to get one of their own. My belly is growing. My abs have decided that since they know what's coming, this being the third time around for them and they're old pros, they're just gonna wave the white flag of surrender now. They're like Listen lady, you're on your own. I don't care if you're not quite 16 weeks, your belly is gonna start to poke out a little bit now. Ha ha. Despite weight loss, my belly still protrudes at the end of the day. No skirting around it. I'm gonna be wearing maternity pants much sooner this time around. It doesn't matter that at nearly 4 months I still wear all my regular jeans, my abs can't hold out much longer. At the beginning of the day I look mostly normal, but at the end, after a couple bowls of frosted flakes, I look a little more pregnant.

I have various theories on pregnancy amnesia, because if we really accurately remembered what it feels like at the beginning of pregnancy we probably wouldn't do it repeat times. Nausea and all that aren't things most people enjoy, yet we subject ourselves to them multiple times, because at the end we get a cute little baby to hold. Until that baby is 5 and says I know all sarcastically after everything you tell her. Then you question things a little. I now have another theory on pregnancy amnesia: men get it too. If husbands really remembered how.......let's say high maintenance pregnant women can be, they would probably all go out and get vasectomies after the first kid. But they too see the perfect little baby with tiny fingers and toes, and they're struck with a sense of Lets have another! before they know what's happening. I can admit that I'm a little well, bitchy, sometimes. I got mad last week cause I didn't like David's suggestion about what kind of car we should get next. Like, seriously mad. And he didn't just back down and surrender his opinion, which is what any man with a pregnant wife who isn't suicidal would do. He said nothing. The nerve of some people. I still think his opinion was stupid. I'm pregnant, therefore always right. All husbands could benefit from learning to just surrender in any argument with a pregnant person. Logic has no place here people.

Symptom wise, I'm not too shabby. I lost a couple of pounds, but gained a couple of inches. I'm anemic, which was no surprise, but getting myself to actually swallow the iron pills is an uphill battle. They taste gross, and my gag reflex is crazy right now. I also have a repeat of an annoying condition I had with Ava. Thrombocytopenia. Complicated name for low platelets. All it really means right now is I have to have blood drawn in between every. single. doctor. visit. And if it is severe enough come delivery day, no epidural. That was my biggest concern with Ava and I barely made it. Yikes! If that is the only thing that I have to deal with then I consider myself lucky. Until I'm having contractions.

My morning sickness, which is not accurately named, has mostly subsided. My instant ravenous hunger has mostly subsided too. I don't need to eat as often, and I don't get really sick if I get hungry. Food aversions continue, but they're mostly red meat based. And I've discovered in some cases that if I'm not the one cooking the nasty red meat that I can eat it. But I'm not gonna cook it. Gross. I'm more averse to gross smells than anything. My kids are both potty trained, but still require some assistance in the wiping department. I dry heave everytime. Its very unattractive. Also causing gagging: scented candles, the laundry soap aisle at the grocery store, olives, canned raviolis, cold gross leftovers when cleaning the fridge, and the smell of things cooking in the crockpot (roast beef, yuck!) or even the oven (teriyaki wings, sick!).

My ladies accompanied me to my last drs appointment, which was exciting for them. I like them to be involved, and Alana went to every visit when I was pregnant with Ava. They heard the heartbeat, which they thought was cool, but I think the real highlights for them were going to a park with giant jungle gyms in Tucson and then to Dairy Queen. Dairy Queen was a highlight for me too. At my next appointment I'll be 19 weeks, so an ultrasound revealing need to know things will be scheduled after that. That is a highly anticipated event in each pregnancy, because it answers a big question: boy or girl. I must know! Alana's vote is that its a boy, and most people seem to agree. For the first time ever I don't actually have a preference. I already have 2 girls that I love and another would be great, but a boy would be just as cool and I wouldn't have to brush his hair every morning. Girls are high maintenance sometimes. At least if I don't want them to look homeless.

I'm excited for the next six months, but I'm in no hurry to speed up time. I love sleep and both of my girls do too, that's why we all sleep till 8 am everyday. And right after this next baby, which I'm officially declaring to be the final one. I'm washing my hands of this whole reproduction thing after this. Finished. Three seems like a good number, and it means I don't need a minivan. Also after this baby: Alana goes to kindergarten. A whole new scary chapter is coming up for us in 2012, and it involves getting up early and actually leaving my house before 8 am. Time is free to go slowly, that's for sure.

I'm Fine with My Old Beginnings

Its a new year. Well, like two weeks in. Most people make resolutions, because there are things about themself that they want to improve, or change, or sweep under the rug and pretend it doesn't exist. Time to eat healthy! Time to exercise! Time to be nicer to people! Time to get my finances in order! Those are all great and I'm sure everyone has good intentions, but realistically by the time February rolls around everyone will be back to normal.

February, the month when no one cares anymore. You can once again eat decadent desserts and drink soda and cuss at other drivers with your kids in the car. Carpe diem! February is the month where everyone looks like a hypocrite for even making a new year's resolution in the first place. Or March, for the really strong willed people.

That is why I don't even bother. Resolutions are for people who want to change, and I'm great the way I am. I could probably be a tad more patient, but I'm pregnant, so my hormones are mostly in charge right now and they say HURRY UP PEOPLE! I'm not going on a diet, cause I love oatmeal cookies, they're great for breakfast and have lots of fiber! I'm not starting some vigorous exercise routine, cause Hello people I'm 15 weeks pregnant, and not about to get any skinnier before July. My abs aren't going in the 6-pack direction, unless your definition of that is someone who just drank a 6-pack.

I'm not making drastic changes in 2012, cause I like my life. Its fine the way it is and I would probably quit before February just like everyone else anyway.

This is Probably How Octomom Got Started

Ava's baby obsession has reached a new level. She now needs several at a time to keep her occupied. And they must be swaddled, cause it soothes them.

In Hindsight This Post is Depressing

The day before we went to Disneyland was one of big plans for me and David. A much anticipated event, for David, was scheduled for that day. Cowboys vs. Cardinals. Here in AZ. And we had tickets. Expensive 4th row tickets. It was set up to be a fun day.

Except that they kept the stadium roof open, so I was freezing the whole time. There was also this creepy fog for at least the first 100 miles, so we had to drive really slow, and you couldn't even see the mountains, which was disorienting. And the lens guidelines online were wrong so I didn't bring a zoom lens, which would've been awesome given our 4th row seats. And then there was the end of the game. The loss in overtime, which was disappointing to say the least. In our pictures we look all happy, because it was before the game. But afterward, my poor husband was mad. That was the second time in a row that has happened. We go all the way to Phoenix to watch his beloved Cowboys, then they lose at the last second. Crap.

The loss was one thing, but then we had to go get on the shuttle back to the parking lot 3 miles away, and the line is long and filled with hecklers. After every game there is a winner and a loser, and the thing about rooting for the team that lost is that all of the fair weather fans come out to talk crap about the Cowboys. Pissed off Cowboys fans outnumbered the Cardinals fans, even though it was in Arizona, but that doesn't stop dumb drunk fans of a team that has never won a Super Bowl from talking crap.

After our long trip back to our car, then the wait to battle traffic to get out of the parking lot, we missed the turn cause we couldn't get over and had to make an illegal u-turn in a random parking lot. Then cause everyone wants back on the freeway it takes about 30 minutes to get 5 miles on the highway. So we could drive 150 miles back home, so we could drive back in that direction the next day to go to Disneyland. Would've been easier to bear if there had been a Cowboys victory, but fate was not on David's side this year. His football season is over and he has to wait till next year. That won't stop him from wearing Cowboys stuff though, that never changes.

Crappy loss aside, there were a handful of fun moments that day that made it bearable. We got there way before the shuttles were running, and its a long walk to the stadium, so we took a pedicab. That was fun, but that poor guy had to be tired at the end of the day from pulling people behind his bike who didn't want to walk. We had a delicious bag of peanuts, which we made a huge mess with. David make have even accidentally spit some into a person's hair in front of us, but no one can prove anything. We also had some pizza, which was nice and warm and actually kept me warm for awhile. And David had fun. Up until the end.

The Cowboys don't come to AZ next year, so he has a year to recover from the heartbreak. Until then, we'll watch the games on TV, where the only hecklers are all of his friends texting him and talking crap.

He still looks happy and excited. This is before the game.

Various Cowboys players. I wish I'd had my zoom lens, we were so close.

Also before the game, when we were blissfully unaware of the outcome.

So close to the field. There are my stupid football earrings too.



Just a small portion of the giant mess we made with peanut shells. I kicked most of them under other people's seats, but I was left with a few cause we ate so many.



And Then There Was Christmas. And 1,000 Barbies.

To say that David goes overboard when it comes to Christmas is a crazy understatement. Alana's first Christmas the presents were piled up practically to the ceiling. Not kidding.

See? Those are just for her. He may have toned it down a little in the past five years, but we still have a lot of presents under our tree. We were done with our shopping. Then we went to Disneyland, where our girls got toys for then, plus a couple of things that David saved till Christmas. Then when we got back we went to Target and ended up getting them each about 2 toys. Then we went to Walmart, where we saw a bike for Alana that we couldn't pass up, so Ava had to get one too. So excessive is the best word to describe our Christmas each year.

This year we did our usual pre-Christmas with my mom. One Barbie each. Then Christmas Eve, 2 Barbies each. And a creepy Bratz doll that scares me. And a massive dollhouse, perfect for putting Barbies in. They like to use both the elevator and the toilet. Who knew? Then Christmas day. Santa just brought the bikes, which for future reference I now know not to assemble a tricycle at nine thirty on Christmas Eve. But Daddy, he is way more generous than Santa. Each girl got a Barbie, of course, but then we got Beast/the prince from Beauty and the Beast (he can be both, depending on his mask), Pocahontas, and wedding Ariel. Plus they got La La Loopsy dolls, shake and go Cars, playdoh, My Little Ponies, Pet shop guys, a Leap Frog laptop, and pretty much every possible toy. Then we went to my parent's house. That meant one more Barbie for Alana, and the much coveted La La Loopsy treehouse. Seriously, she has wanted that toy forever, she is spoiled by her Aunt Moe. Ava got a cute stuffed La La Loopsy too, which she loved, and they both got new purses and tons of new jewelry that surprisingly all made it home and didn't get lost. A Christmas miracle.

David and I got our standard stuff we picked out for ourselves. I got a new lens. He got a Cowboys sweater. And hats. And everyone got a bunch of candy in their stocking, which we still have a lot of. I'm kind of tired of it, and I didn't really eat that much of it. I don't care for Pez either, so there's no temptation there.

Then we ate turkey. And m&m smores bars. And Alana carried the car around. Then we came home and I made excuses as to why I couldn't open every Barbie they got. My hands were tired.

I enjoyed this Christmas, which was our last one with just two kids. That very thought is scary and makes me sad cause I've really loved just having my two ladies, but my belly is growing and that kid isn't staying in there till after next Christmas. This was a good year, and both my girls were big enough to open everything on their own, which was a first, and the last time I don't have to open stuff for a couple of years.

The bittersweet feeling left at the end of Christmas day has always left me feeling a little sad. All that build up, all those Christmas shows on our DVR that will get erased after countless viewings, all that sad ripped up wrapping paper, the huge pile of toy boxes that I will be getting rid of well into January, and the knowledge that all those pretty decorations are coming down in a couple days, they always leave me feeling bummed out. I get over it quick though, by New Years I'm normal, the tree is down and my living room looks all bare again with the color of the Christmas lights. So till next year Christmas, farewell.

Christmas baby and her jammies.

Awkward timer shot. I need a remote so I don't have to run to get in the picture.

Christmas jammie girls.

Christmas Eve. Alana talked me into letting her wear lip stain. She looks old. I don't like it. She also managed some time with the flat iron in there too, her hair looks so different.

A few of her gifts.

You can tell Ava's feelings about a present, cause her face gets all crazy.

One obligatory present picture for each of us.

New bikes. Alana will probably have her training wheels on till she is like 8, just like me.

Disney Wrap Up

It has now been almost a month since we went on vacation, and my initial momentum/post vacation energy has worn off. I feel the same way about Christmas. I should eventually blog about it, but I really don't feel like it. So today Disneyland won out over Christmas, since it was longer ago and interest in it is waning. I blogged about it more than once, but there is still a few things left to say. Listing them seems the most efficient/least amount of work. So here you go:

• Alana was my brave girl and went on lots of new rides that she was tall enough for, including Splash Mountain. She got so wet that I had to change her entire outfit, but for some reason I didn't have extra socks or underwear for her so she went commando till we went back to our room later.
• Ava was so much better this time than in February. She loved every minute of Disneyland and kept me company when Alana and David went on rides without us.
• I still find it crazy that people line up to watch the parade 3 hours before it starts. That's kind of excessive.
• The entryway to California Adventure is so torn up and unrecognizable that I'm glad the construction should be finally done before we go back again. Walking all the way around through a service corridor is a pain in the butt.
• I don't care if its sixty degrees outside, I still love soft serve chocolate vanilla swirl cones. They are a good dessert after a big bowl of clam chowder. I love Disneyland food.
• Ava was hesitant about the characters at first, but she came around. No tears this time. It helped that her big sister was so brave.
• Best Western right across the street was not only a better deal than the Disneyland hotels we stayed in the last two years, it had free parking and was a shorter walk. Its right at the crosswalk by the shuttle station, which was way shorter than walking all the way through Downtown Disney to get to the Disneyland hotel. And the room was bigger. And had better water pressure. And we parked right in front of our room, for free. No $20 a night to park half a mile away. We will stay there again.
• If your 2 year old throws up on the way there, wash her clothes immediately. If you leave them the whole week in a bag and pretend they don't exist, they will be ruined. Now I know.
• I hate paying a ton for a bottle of water, but that didn't keep me from forgetting extra waters almost every time we went into the park.
• The Christmas parade is awesome and worth watching. Still wish I had gotten to watch the fireworks from inside the park, instead of in front of Denny's by our hotel RIGHT after we left.
• A sit and stand stroller containing a 5 and 2 year old is heavy. And hard to push. Especially through tight spaces. That's what strong husbands are for. They will also hold your bag sometimes if you carry a messenger bag rather than a purse.
• Get in line to see the fairies right when Pixie Hollow opens, cause that line can take forever. It may look short, but its not. We went there right at 9 when it opened and there was only one person in front of us. It was such a short wait!
• Disneyland is far from restful, but its fun and magical to see through your children's eyes, and will make you feel like a kid again. Every time, without fail.

Now, the rest (mostly), of our pictures.

Food is the best way to occupy kids while waiting for a parade. Popcorn and cotton candy work for us!

Alana loves the Minnie Breakfast, hugs for everyone. Ava was less convinced.

We always have to ride the carousel. Always.

Dug and Jake. Ava was getting braver! She had just met them and she loved them.

More hugs from characters.

Flynn's smolder could use more work. He sort of looks crazy or something. But Rapunzel is a big favorite, so we had to see her, of course.